It was like Winnie the Pooh getting stuck in the mouth of that cave. I heaved and pulled and asked nicely, but Fatty couldn’t budge. It took me a month and a week to work up the courage to crack the glass. Continue reading “I Tried to Kill Fat Bastard”→
I’m excited for you to meet Fat Bastard. He’s the size of a small tennis ball. Which means he isn’t the size of a tennis ball… He’s the size of a golf ball- and a half. He’s the size of a large plum… He’s his own man and his own size and he doesn’t need to tell you or anyone else about it. He’s the big fella at the party who just sits in the corner and is quiet most of the time and after things get going, ends up being hilarious, but still quietly. And only if he feels like it.
He came from our CSA box. That is a Community Supported Agriculture box. If you already know what that is, please *skip ahead to find out about who Fat Bastard is dating and his hobbies. A Community Supported Agriculture box (try to say that five times fast) (you totally can) (I just have trouble with it) (but practicing just now helped more than I expected) is a box full of vegetables from a local farm. Continue reading “Meet Fat Bastard The Live Avocado”→
I’m embracing my thoughts. It’s a whole new world and I’m the carpet AND Jasmine. And Aladdin? Hmm. AND the monkey! Yay! Who is the tiger?
Anyway, I’m letting it all flow free and seed is what I woke up curious about. I’m collecting seed, but I don’t know much about it. Here is a fine mind ramble from Gamble that may come in handy later. It also may just scare/confuse you/me, so if you want to read something more sane, skip to the photo caption below. Also, many of these questions probably have answers. I was just having fun relishing in wonder this morning…
Seeds have protein, so wouldn’t strawberries have a bit of protein?
Is the protein in a banana in the seeds or the meat?
What do you call the banana part of a banana? Other than banana? Or meat?
What makes us eat certain seeds and not others? Cashews (big) vs. lemon seeds (smaller), I’d think we’d eat the smaller one… Is it just taste? Or texture? Or some other biological reason?
Many seeds are designed for animals to eat, travel around with in their belly, and poop out later to spread the seed. Some scientists think avocados were designed for bigger animals to eat, digest, and poop out the seed. Does that mean I am really over-stepping my boundaries as a small person every time I eat one?
Do all seeds have tannins like an avocado seed?
How come those large animals could process avocado seeds while to some smaller animals, avocado seeds are toxic?
When we chew seeds, doesn’t that kill their chance of survival?
And doesn’t that go against this idea of ingestion for poop seed sowing?
Is that why seeds and beans are harder for humans to digest?
Because chewed seeds are stickin’ it to the man?
Are you upset by that bad joke? Is that a joke?
I heard that when flax seed is eaten whole, we don’t get its full nutrients so its better to eat ground flax seed. But we end up chewing it when it’s whole, so what’s the difference?
But it’s true that when I eat whole flax seeds, so many end up in my poop fully intact. Seems like that would be good for them- why wouldn’t the flax seeds make that option appealing to us nutritionally?
Nuts, seeds, beans, peas, and legumes are all seeds. Why do we call them different names?
I’m bringing the guacamole to the party… in 13 years!
I just found out that it takes 5-13+ years for an avocado tree grown from seed to bear fruit! Whoaholymybatmanthatsalongtimegoodness!
That made me realize that if we all understood how long it really takes for nature to move, for a tree to run it’s natural course, and we were the specific person that tended to that tree for all of those years, we would respect them in a totally different way. If I cared for a tree for 12 years and it got sick and died that year, the year before it fruited, I would be so attached to it at that point that I would weep.
What I’ve learned so far about starting avocados from seed: Stab with toothpicks, stick in water, & love. Just like it happens in nature…
This is Wilbur. He’s my little bacon avocado. I’m excited that he’s inspired some friends to make their own avocado babies. And other friends across the country literally got their avocado seeds the same day I posted his first picture, with the intention to plant their own trees, before even seeing him! Avocados are great and they’re making our minds think alike! Creepy…
So I’m hoarding avocados now. It’s really fun. I feel like I get all the beneficial feelings of being a crazy cat lady, without the pre-packaged judgement 🙂 But give it time, the world will soon have a new breed of stereotype: The Hoarding Avocado Woman.
This morning, while cleaning the kitchen, I looked at my pile of four avocado seeds sitting in a puddle of water on the back edge of the sink. I leave them there as a visual to-do list and because this is the best thing I’ve thought of so far to keep them alive until I can plant them. The water from washing dishes each day splashes on them and kinda forms a little life-nest beneath them, giving me the time to come up with another glass jar somehow.
Everything in the store in a glass jar has a new meaning to me. I want to crouch down and surprise-leap onto my prey in Trader Joes, and flailingly leave it’s contents strewn wherever just get to it’s magnificant glass hide and display it with pride along my window sill. Continue reading “Why can I buy avocados?”→