I Tried to Kill Fat Bastard

Well, I didn’t TRY. On purpose. But I sure made an attempt. What I was trying to do was save him! He got too fat for his glass:

Fat Bastard Avocado in a little glass
Fat Bastard in a Little Glass

But he kept eating! So he literally was stuck in the glass. I couldn’t get him out! He fit fine in June, when he grew a root. Here he is on August 19th, 2013:

See how he’s squeezing into this dress?

It was like Winnie the Pooh getting stuck in the mouth of that cave. I heaved and pulled and asked nicely, but Fatty couldn’t budge. It took me a month and a week to work up the courage to crack the glass. Continue reading “I Tried to Kill Fat Bastard”

A Pair of Sandwiches

#veggiesandwich #prettycolors #totallygonnafallapart"
#veggiesandwich #prettycolors #totallygonnafallapart
#beet #notaburger #beetjuice #notblood"
#beet #notaburger #beetjuice #notblood”

Veggie Sandwich: brown rice bread and all organic avocado, mushroom, red pepper, tomato, swiss chard, olive oil, raw apple cider vinegar, & non-gmo dill

Grapefruit Hummus & Beet Sandwich: brown rice bread and homemade hummus (organic garbanzo beans, organic olive oil, sea salt, splash of lemon juice, *organic grapefruit juice, tahini, organic garlic clove), non-gmo dill, and (the rest is organic) avocado, tomato, red onion, raw apple cider vinegar, & olive oil

*Please note that we only had one drop of an older lemon in the fridge so we opted to gamble on grapefruit juice… because all the other hummus ingredients were already in the blender and grapefruits were the only citrus in the house. We only squeezed in a little, and still added the old lemon drop. And we couldn’t tell the difference! Guess why, either we: Continue reading “A Pair of Sandwiches”

Flowers Become Fruit: An Homage to Simon & Elaine’s Garden

Every time I see a flower on a fruit tree or a garden vegetable, I get hungry. Maybe this is common knowledge, but I didn’t know until recently that where ever there is a flower on a plant that grows fruit, there will be a fruit! It’s like an awesome movie trailer of what’s to come. Or even better, the X on a pirate map of where the treasure is. Or even best, a beautiful flower that’s come to say, “I will soon be a tasty piece of free food for you to eat!”

When I was farming, we would weed the strawberries regularly, and take all the brown parts off of them in client’s yards so they would be pretty, or pot them up to sell. And I slowly noticed that the little yellow center of their happy white flowers would get bigger and make a dome. And sometimes I’d see pre-ripe, young, small strawberries that hadn’t turned red yet. But it took me a while before I saw the same little yellowish strawberry emerging out of the center of a flower. Holy crap! “Does each flower become a strawberry?!” Continue reading “Flowers Become Fruit: An Homage to Simon & Elaine’s Garden”